A Fleeting Thought


Assume, just for a moment,

You are fired from your job


The nine to six daily grind

Of unruly classes, officious bosses—


What will you do but walk in the alleys

Of your dead dreams, soaked

In the neon lights of long loneliness?


Your desk is orderly and neat,

Your lectures feed your family.


No one seems to be bothered,

Except for the occasional frowning

Of the contours of your father’s face.


From one classroom to another, you walk,

Bobbling on a wave of drowsiness,

Dreaming the most august poetic openings.


But, wait, assume for a moment,

You are fired from your job—


What will you then write about?

With what unease and what foreboding?



Bibek Adhikari 

Poetry by Bibek
Read 167 times
Written on 2018-09-18 at 18:47

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josephus The PoetBay support member heart!
Iíve never been fired simply because Iíve always worked for myself. I have lost some significant business clients though, one of which represented over half my income. That was shocking but also energizing. Iíve also walked the dull and mind numbing halls of life and was very glad for its riddance.

Bibek, thanks for writing this poem. It refocused me, in and odd way, much appreciated.

I think this poem, which is already good, could use concrete details to make it great. Adjectives can ruin many a great writing. I know this more than most. Details details details make great writing. I know this better than most.

Ashe The PoetBay support member heart!
I like both comments mentioned already but I love the way the poem is written, beginning with:
"Assume, just for a moment
That you've been fired from your job."

That's a very profound statement that even as it frees the person from all those unruly classes and officious professors, it also makes a person feel a failure and the despair is real.

I also have been fired from a job, unfairly I thought, which did both, freed me from a place I dreaded to go each day but made me feel, "how dare they?" Also, at the time I was a single mother of three children, so the worry was immense.

A tremendously rich poem.

Thomas DeFreitas The PoetBay support member heart!
"soaked/ In the neon lights of long loneliness."

I'm loving that line (and the poem as a whole! --- but that line is especially powerful ...)

Lawrence Beck The PoetBay support member heart!
I was fired. My classes were taken from me. There was plenty left to write about, and of course, unease and foreboding readily attach themselves to almost any subject.