gosh how sad!


My very first haiku...phew!

Rising she glowers
At her flowers beauty
Willing wiltedness.



Poetry by jenks The PoetBay support member heart!
Read 421 times
Written on 2008-11-15 at 02:58

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good start here :) keep it on
2008-11-16


Kathy Lockhart
this created a very vivid image. I could see the glower because I have had that same look at the things i try to grow inside my home. I am mostly successful in growing dust bunnies.

I agree with Ade. You need one more syllable in line 2. 5-7-5
you have 5-6-5.

Other than that, a fine haiku.

: ) kathy
2008-11-15