I love extended metaphors


New Worlds

I was always in search for some silly recognition.
digging deep to their inner crevices
hoping I'd be discovered as "amazing"
So I could see myself as beautiful
only if they thought so too.
It was a complicated web of vicious circles
Leaving me nauseated and disoriented
but the habit had formed, running tracks in my mind.

...Yet suddenly the wheel has stopped spinning.
And in wake of my new calmness,
the mud has settled
and there's a new world to discover.

Take my hand and come with me?

I am simple when I'm with you.
And my waters are still.
I've been pulled from shore to shore
by the tides of infatuation and emptiness,
my toes barely grazing the sands of safety,
never allowing myself to be rooted in one place,
for fear of upheaval in the end.
But now I find myself on the warm beaches,
I've been washed up on an island
lazing with my feet planted in the white sand
I've found myself with a new and wondrous world to explore

Take my hand and come with me?



Poetry by Sparks
Read 897 times
Written on 2010-01-15 at 01:43

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"I am simple when I'm with you.
And my waters are still." This remarkable feeling.. from now on this is a feeling I will think of.. because it says so much, for me.. I came to think, a lot.. the text moved me.. thank you..! all in all, everything, in it, was pure beautiful.. with some sort of magical calm..

Language: 5
Format: 4
Mood: 5
Overall: 5
2010-01-18



Stunningly beautiful scenery here Sparks! You write the language of love so clearly, you surely must be in love?

Smiling at you

Tai

Language: 5
Format: 5
Mood: 5
Overall: 5
2010-01-15


Brian Oarr
"I've been washed up on an island
lazing with my feet planted in the white sand"

I like these creative lines very much; their metaphor infuses your poem with great strenght.

Kudos to you, poet!

--- Brian

Language: 4
Format: 3
Mood: 5
Overall: 4
2010-01-15