To give oneself

I watch you leave the room
leaving the door ajar

Every day I let you go again
just in case you never return

There was supposed to have been a time when he really was mine
but that belief has been de-constructed and thoroughly torn to shreds
But that's fine.. that's okay

When he kneeled before me and asked me to be his
he was not asking me
rather giving himself to the moment and the illusion, the weakness of needing me more than he loved me

Others get hurt and move on
someone always seems to come for them

Is it because no one ever really gives themselves truly?
and I cannot delude myself for long enough to let them take me with them?

or is it because I never give myself?
never dare, yet dare more than I ever thought I would

I watch you look behind you as you leave
do you want me to follow?
or should I sit here and wait for you to return?

it is your move
you may have as much of me as you wish

I already know
you are never mine



Poetry by SecretWords The PoetBay support member heart!
Read 717 times
Written on 2011-10-04 at 22:10

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I like this, S.W., though it triggers some difficult memories for me, concerning one of my exes (2001/2).
Well, he certainly needed me, but he did not love me though he claimed he did. For when I gave myself completely, he shied away. Sadly, he couldn't accept my illness.
I no longer see him and I've no wish to either; ours wasn't a healthy relationship. Best to leave it, I reckon.
So this thoughtful and well-expressed piece serves to remind me that I'm in a much better place without him; many thanks. Turns out Birdie knows her heart.
2011-10-05