A subtle idea that has been stirring in my head.


Inner Reflections

Broken reflections across calm waters

Showed hurt, compromise, yearning

Long ago in that city bungalow

We thrived in life, I longed for better

Yet my wanting wasn't without purpose

Other targets closed in on you

I fought valiantly to rescue you from them

I failed and you slowly slipped away

Years later I could only watch this mirror

Severed in silent pieces

Only a corner of our love remained

Shadow hands caressed these shards

Each moment brought upon reflection

Like the mirror itself, something remained

Moments later in a busy commute

I saw you in all radiant light

Still you kept a glow about you

Suddenly the mirror become whole

Each severed shard was revived with hope

Peace and an unbreakable bond

That day I felt my world begin

A new reflection to be forever shown



Poetry by Coolaaron88
Read 1450 times
Written on 2006-11-21 at 21:59

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Leif H T Strand
Modern. Accurate. You could use 5000 adjectives to describe this poem. I prefer good.

Language: 5
Format: 5
Mood: 5
Overall: 5
2006-11-25



it seems to me every poem you write is deep and touching. i loved this poem- and then again, i love just about everything you write. you really are gifted. good job aaron. :)

Language: 5
Format: 4
Mood: 5
Overall: 5
2006-11-22


tony legba
The central idea of the poem is carried through well.
Reflections are images--but the images within the poem are not particularly visual.
The syntax is quite short and sharp, which fits with the broken theme within the poem, so theme and method fit together.
I find the colouring of words distracting, however, and do not feel that they add much to the poem.

Language: 3
Format: 3
Mood: 3
Overall: 3
2006-11-22


Kathy Lockhart
Aaron this is remarkable! I love the whole of it. It tells a story, it is poignant, it is visual. It is alive! well done!!
2006-11-22


Xuxa
Another Fantastic write Aaron. Simply Excellent to read and very eloquent. It's just Great! ;)
2006-11-22

Texts




Love: The Endless Journey
by Coolaaron88