Like a train from back in the old days
The coffee spluttered through a head of steam
The toaster decided to get in on the act
Then I noticed we're all out of cream

Scraping the charcoal off the cremated bread
"We've no butter, would you like some cheese?"
But then I decided to make poached eggs
just boil some water, that's a breeze

The freshly squeezed fruit juice wasn't just quite
It was in a carton that I had to tear open
I'm sure those stains will wash out alright
At least that is really what I am hopin'

She sat a moment and watched me try
I'd ruined our breakfast and she could see
But then she whispered those three little words
Through gritted teeth - "here, let me!"