July 31, 2020.
the thing about journals
when i was a teenager i'd always say i wanted to document my life
so every year almost, i'd buy a new journal or a notebook with spiral spine
i'd pick up a pen and in a few days i'd lose it and my drive to write
and then months would pass and i'd say it's different this time
but the thing about journals is that they don't leave you high and dry
the thing about journals is that they'll never leave your side
when you're ready to cry and you're ready to come out of hiding and stop lying
that journal will welcome you with understanding and pride
i would build a personality for my journals and though i always felt safe
even some days i would write lie after lie and put on a brave face
because this was someone who listened and cared, someone who always was there
and disappointment seemed like betrayal after all it's effort-- I didn't prevail
the thing about journals is they lend you an ear
they're unbiased and uncertain and that makes them real
but my patterns ring true and i'd never follow through
so now i'm left with half empty journals and friends I no longer want to use
Poetry by aidan haskel
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Written on 2020-07-31 at 23:13
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