These rantings

constitute the glue

that keeps this wildly disparate phenomenon

tolerably together

under a name I've been addressed with

since the beginning of identity

I hear a couple of woodpeckers

treating the house percussively, as a sound box,

adding their raw engagement with matter

to my construction of Where & When

The washing machine downstairs

in the kitchen

sounds like someone throwing up;

a puking machinery coming in handy

in the handling of reality, as I see it

Taking notes

out of the stream of consciousness

is a way, a method

to stop, think, assess,

blurt truthful lies & false truths,

cross out details; freely add others

A helicopter approaches

in an ominous under-the-breath vibration

swelling in murmuring might

that soon grows into a heavenly growl,

elevating my overview

into a vertiginous equilibrium

from which the sight of forests, lakes and rivers

of this wild land

opens and spreads, from mountain to sea;

the horizons distancing themselves

at the velocity of cognition,

until the rotor blades

and the roar of the engine up above

change character and pitch

in an almost surprising demonstration

of the doppler effect,

soon to die down into a faint whisper

in the distance

I paint the town b & w,

recuperate at ”the stations of the breath”

that Dylan Thomas spoke of in between drinks,

realizing I don't deserve these good last years,

consulting Kuan-yin

who doesn't give me a straight absolution,

but convinces me

that ”there must be some way out of here”,

although some earlier versions

of this broadcasting being

are intolerable to me

I hear Gunwald cat calling out to me

from downstairs

He needs to socalize, lie on my lap, purr

He wants me to put my mouth to his forehead

and blow softly

He's not asking for food right now;

he wants closeness & cuddling,

like any sensible sentient being

This text started out in an intellectual manner,

observing life

from an undefined vantage point,

but soon entered wakefulness

and the full extent of the moment,

without ulterior motives;

a scary place