No more "poetic" chat


Time dissipates when the right sound
collides with inexplicable present
and soft respite erases the hand
of all circular instrument we support.

Mother of night is not barren,
nor devoid of any mystery catch
in creeks of your own making
with feral streams of fertile chaos.

There will be another coming
where masters of expression
will crush the easy way out
and demand content of interest.

There will be an end to public, poetic chat
and silly letters to unmatchable mates.
Faith is a big word no one takes seriously,
effort is an ugly word.




Poetry by Bob
Read 723 times
Written on 2006-10-18 at 01:20

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Ian Bowen
Bob, do not want to seem a pain but, your second to last stanza could read even better if you again remove the 'and'... to read as follows:

'There will be another coming
where masters of expression
will crush the easy way out
demanding content of interest'

Hope this helps as I really enjoyed reading this piece of work.
Regards,
Ian
2006-10-18


Bob
Glad I got people going :-) T
he mind is an exellent tool!
Emotions colours our expressions the way we let them.
I do not have patent on what is good or bad poetry, just a personal opinion. The rest is up to you.
I agree with the suggestion of the "and" and will remove it :-)
2006-10-18


Ian Bowen
Bob, not wanting to get into the subject matter of your poem, I would just like to say that your last two stanzas could be improved by removing the 'and' from the last lines...I believe it lets your poem down right at the end.
Ian
2006-10-18


BlueyedSoul
*passes bob a happy pill*

lighten up Bob lol

~Blue
2006-10-18


Saga
Chatting, and what are you doing here, let me guess, chatting about not chatting at all, I guess!!! Smile, you'll live longer!!!
2006-10-18


Mikkel Mowinckel
I'm with Bob on this one.....
2006-10-18


-Angela
will you be making an approved list of topics and the like so we can change all of poetbay to suit your needs bob?
2006-10-18


robust
why?
2006-10-18