It's a letter I'll never send. The receiver will never read this.
Remember when we met? God, I was so happy then. Everything just seemed right. I had friends, family, money(-ish), health, happiness. You were such a bright soul from the moment I met you.
Even then, I knew you would break me.
I saw it, I predicted it. But somehow, you were worth it to me. We talked for so long. Music, punting, drugs. You name it, I knew it about you.
And I loved that. I still love that.
We had a connection, and this I know is true. In that assembly we had, I knew. It sounds so elementary, but I knew. Emma could tell. Ryan could tell.
It all feels so long ago now.
That game with Nyssa and Melinda? Hilarious, haha. Your face, talking to them was priceless. You kept asking me to save you from them, and when we talked, they would shoot me nasty looks.
Maybe...
Maybe if I'd gone to the pond that night Lucas got caught instead of going to Kelsay's, maybe things would be different. But, whatever.
It is how it is I suppose.
I thought you were perfect then. Flawless. Your smile still makes me smile, even now. Now.
We could have avoided this.
Homecoming. We should have danced more, just like you said. Dancing with you, I knew then too. Your hands on my hips, pulling at my dress. Your chin came down and touched my cheek and I could feel your breath on my neck. You pulled me tighter, and we danced harder, faster. When the song ended and we both snapped back, I was afraid to look at you in the eyes for a long time.
I wanted another.
But I drove you to Zack's that night and if it had just been you and I in the car, I don't think I would have made it. I would have been too distracted.
The pond that night.
Why didn't you just kiss me?
I opened my heart to you.
If I could turn back time, I would gladly sacrifice years off my life for a second chance. Why, why can't I have it back?
Now. Even now.
I still have feelings for you, though it makes me sick to my stomach to admit. And just... everything. If nothing more, I need you as a friend. You were good at that too. I felt like you really listened and really understood. I felt something. I need a second chance. I need that back.
I need it.
Words by kgirard
Read 642 times
Written on 2008-11-17 at 01:19
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I need that back.
I'm broken inside, don't you know that?Remember when we met? God, I was so happy then. Everything just seemed right. I had friends, family, money(-ish), health, happiness. You were such a bright soul from the moment I met you.
Even then, I knew you would break me.
I saw it, I predicted it. But somehow, you were worth it to me. We talked for so long. Music, punting, drugs. You name it, I knew it about you.
And I loved that. I still love that.
We had a connection, and this I know is true. In that assembly we had, I knew. It sounds so elementary, but I knew. Emma could tell. Ryan could tell.
It all feels so long ago now.
That game with Nyssa and Melinda? Hilarious, haha. Your face, talking to them was priceless. You kept asking me to save you from them, and when we talked, they would shoot me nasty looks.
Maybe...
Maybe if I'd gone to the pond that night Lucas got caught instead of going to Kelsay's, maybe things would be different. But, whatever.
It is how it is I suppose.
I thought you were perfect then. Flawless. Your smile still makes me smile, even now. Now.
We could have avoided this.
Homecoming. We should have danced more, just like you said. Dancing with you, I knew then too. Your hands on my hips, pulling at my dress. Your chin came down and touched my cheek and I could feel your breath on my neck. You pulled me tighter, and we danced harder, faster. When the song ended and we both snapped back, I was afraid to look at you in the eyes for a long time.
I wanted another.
But I drove you to Zack's that night and if it had just been you and I in the car, I don't think I would have made it. I would have been too distracted.
The pond that night.
Why didn't you just kiss me?
I opened my heart to you.
If I could turn back time, I would gladly sacrifice years off my life for a second chance. Why, why can't I have it back?
Now. Even now.
I still have feelings for you, though it makes me sick to my stomach to admit. And just... everything. If nothing more, I need you as a friend. You were good at that too. I felt like you really listened and really understood. I felt something. I need a second chance. I need that back.
I need it.
Words by kgirard
Read 642 times
Written on 2008-11-17 at 01:19
Save as a bookmark (requires login) Write a comment (requires login) Send as email (requires login) Print text
