On a grey day in spring:


A letter home from WW1

Snowy air blows right by the bedside-

Rows its course, laughing, through my head's side

Flows so smooth in the blankets of my dreams

Cold breeze making my arms spread wide.

 

Grey day, grey day

Bring me back this december

Oh, grey day, grey day

Let me know if you're feelin' alright, just remember..

 

Rainy spring day leaning on a park bench

Marching through May hiding in a dark trench

What went wrong for me to end up like me

Soft storm blowing through the cherry tree branch

And I said

 

Grey day, grey day

Bring me back this december

Oh, grey day, grey day

Let me know if you're feelin' alright, just remember..

 

Oh, send me a letter, love

I miss your constant cheer

Oh, send me a locket, love

 And i'll write in it I'd rather be,

Anywhere but here

 

Grey day

Oh, grey day

Bring me back

To stay





Poetry by Joe Fern
Read 716 times
Written on 2009-01-10 at 06:02

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Dee Daffodil
One can feel the sense of loneliness and desolation from your poem (song), it's as though you were actually there. Nice work !
Hugs,
Dee
2009-01-13


Amna Ehsan
The flow of words here is making itself a rhythm that actually has made me sing it . Trust me not for the second read rather it hooked me singing swining wheni read it for the first time. Plus the picture envisaged here is fairly vivid!
kudos!!!
2009-01-10



Grey painted a picture of ashes in my mind possibly because of the title. I was ready for anything when I saw the title, but I was pleasantly surprised, a very light piece, yet I wonder if the strum would get intense in some lines reflecting on the letter of what the title means to you and others, I liked the hint of seasons possibly representing what Spring is to you, love the breezes of atmosphere, I could really see this as a video clip. Nice work here and a nice flow as well with possibly guitar playing.
2009-01-10