He called again today.  The sound of the phone ringing sent chills down my spine.  Somehow his ring bore a melancholy note that set it apart.  I even hesitated to answer.  But how could I not?  The love of his life was dieing and all he was asking for was a sympathetic ear and a few words of comfort.  There was little enough I could say, of course, and none of it would change his world for the better.  But I knew from experience that sometimes just the sound of a warm voice can keep us from the brink of despair.  I checked my caller ID. Yes, it was him.

"Hello, Kevin."  A long pause.  A deeply indrawn breath. 
"She's gone."  Just that.  Nothing more.  An eternity of silence.
"Kevin." 
I thought I was prepared for this moment; would instinctively know what to say.  But now I felt frozen in a vacuum of numb denial.  He needed me to be present with him in this moment and all I could feel was the vacancy. 

"She left you something."  There was a question in his voice, a wondering.  He seemed unsure of the validity of his own words.
"What do you mean, Kevin?" 
"An email.  Her last request of me was that I read it, then send it on to you.  It should be in your inbox now."
"Kevin, she doesn't....didn't....even know me." 
"She knew of you."
"What?  How could that be?"  My blood froze in my veins. 
"She knew there was someone else in my life.  I never could hide anything from her."  His voice was almost lost in the depth of his pain. 
"Oh, no no no, Kevin."
The silence was palpable.  I could almost feel his trembling through the line.  Always the gentleman, he would never accuse me.  He would take the load on himself.  If there was any blame, he would consider it his. 
But how could there be blame in love?  He and I were miles apart.  Had never even met.  He had been by her side through it all, as it should be, and nothing we shared had denied her anything she needed.  In fact, he often said that talking with me helped him keep it together for her. 
Damn!  How had she known?  What had she felt?  And why leave a message behind for me? 
"I have to go now", he said.  "There are so many things to attend to."  A silent pause.  "Just read it."  Then a soft click.

I disconnected and dropped the phone on the bed.  A sudden weakness in my knees made me grab for the back of the chair at my computer desk.  I sank into it.  With hands that trembled I booted up, trying three times before I could successfully type in my password.  Opening my email server, I saw the notification.  Seven emails.  Good.  I would open the other six first, postponing the moment that would surely fill me with shame and self-loathing.
Inane.  Cowardly.  I clicked on the one email from Kevin's addy. 

Download file?  What the hell?  For once my usually lethargic computer reacted with instantaneous speed.  Open file.  This was the moment to face myself and know who I really was.  Take the consequences. 

The screen displayed a picture of the man she had loved and lived for...and next to it one of myself I had sent him by his request. 
And below, just four words: 

                                  "I love you guys."