Remembering the dream of a woman long lost to time and life. 




Jazz With Fond Memories of Long Forgotten Times

Jazz piano Play for me

let me hear my melody

Gentle rythmic easy low

mild and sweet the memories flow

 

take me back to easy times

of youthful joy and tropic  climes

to feel the sand beneath my toes

to hear the surf's orgasmic throws

 

palms that lace the evening sky

stars that toss their light awry

to tease the eager sense of love

made real by you my treasure trove





Poetry by josephus The PoetBay support member heart!
Read 344 times
Written on 2020-12-17 at 19:44

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Elle The PoetBay support member heart!
I can feel that sand right now! Smell that seabreeze - the sea and music are my lifeblood - I used to play in a jazz band back when I was studying music - and those brief encounters when we would crowd into a smoke filled apartment, thank you for your memory which stoked my memories of times past and loves long lost

Elle x
2020-12-19



I love how you sustain the four-beat rhythm and the rhyme. This is a well-made poem, indeed!

The two lines which begin the last stanza are perhaps the most beautiful moment in a poem that is beautiful from start to finish.

For the sake of the rhythm, you might try rendering the last line of the second stanza as "to hear the surf's orgasmic throes." Keeps the beat intact!

But bravo and indeed bravissimo --- a joy to read!
2020-12-17


ken d williams The PoetBay support member heart!
Music being a reminder of happy days
Play the music louder maestro - DJ
Ken D
2020-12-17


Liam The PoetBay support member heart!
Fond memories and perhaps a little hint of wondering come through in this text; for me at least.

Thanks for sharing.
Liam.
2020-12-17