Written in about 5 mins sometime during the fall of 05. I have no idea why I wrote it, and i'm not at all satisfied, but it'll do for now.


Souls at zero

things change
if we allow them to

vaporize

perhaps I shall return
only to inform you
that you were not there
when I needed you the most

things conform
if we want them to

tranquilize

and on that very day
I will only allow
one of us to change
yet I fear I can't

things happen
and never for a reason

realize

there was never a time
only brief moments of lives
and while I fail to yearn
you can watch me as I try



Poetry by discord
Read 367 times
Written on 2006-06-14 at 03:24

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discord
Thanks. I've given into your suggestions, Arti.
2006-06-15


Teala
I like how this poem is set up, really great job!
2006-06-14


Arti
Beautiful work there. May I suggest a correction though?
The poem would flow much better if you changed "vaporized" to "vaporize", "tranquilzed" to "tranqulize", and "realized" to "realize"..
What do you think?
And welcome to the bay!
Hugs,
Arti.
2006-06-14