I had forgotten about villanelles.


Angry Villanelle

You are rude and harsh, can you not tell?
It hurts me when you talk to me this way
I do not understand you very well

I hear no word from you for long a spell,
but often, when you do find things to say,
you are rude and harsh, can you not tell?

when I was young, and still within my shell,
you oft could draw me out, with art and play
I do not understand you very well

It seems that as I grew we slowly fell
apart, and you were awfully mean to me today.
you are rude and harsh, can you not tell?

In the distance now, I hear the knell
of mournful song that says we've gone astray.
I do not understand you very well

And now at last I fear the final spell
of childhood adoration's gone away.
You are rude and harsh, can you not tell?
I do not understand you very well.



Poetry by Baskenmütze
Read 722 times
Written on 2009-09-18 at 02:45

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WildGoose
Dang...I don't envy this person at allllll, and I share Nick's curiosity. But either way, whether you'd care to divulge said information or keep it to yourself, this is quite an excellent write.
2009-09-24


Rob Graber
Addressed to a rather "villainous" individual, it would seem; I enjoyed this. "You are crude and harsh, can you not tell?" "I do not understand you very well": These lines make a memorable refrain!
2009-09-18



I would say the writer was more Angry than this rather mildly angry Villanelle, but it works and the form brings your disquiet home to roost very well.

Smiling at you

Tai
2009-09-18


Nick Matherne
Who is this about?
I like the way you used the repeating lines
It is better to use vague-er ones like these so the poem as a whole makes more sense
Good write!
2009-09-18


Kathy Lockhart
This is great.
I love the sound of a villanelle
and you wrote it so very well.

kathy :)
2009-09-18