Thanks again Jon.


Silent Alarms are Screaming/Dying tulips between tulips

Silent alarms are
screaming late into the night,
An unbalanced mind
everyday is getting harder to hide out of sight.

Dying red tulips between dead black tulips
strangled by a lot of self-hate,
screws loose from the day I was born
Rescue? - for me you are too late.

because they are
silent alarms screaming late into the night,
my calls for help you can not hear
'You' wake up 'sane' every morning
but my end is near,
An unbalance mind
discovered by your piercing light and accusing sight.

01/04/06








Poetry by liz munro The PoetBay support member heart!
Read 539 times
Written on 2006-04-01 at 09:24

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Jon Hanover
You did good on this one nice twists. There are a few lines that seem labored but a good piece nonetheless.
2006-04-02


Zoya Zaidi
It is amazing how you have amalgamated all the lines to produce a kaleidoscopic picture!
Bravo, Lizzy!
((((Hugs))))
Love, xxx, Zoya
2006-04-01


Christian Ward
Dark, very dark indeed but still pretty cool. Love the contrast between the two images, very neat and enjoyable
2006-04-01


.
I think this is very clever how you worked some suggestions from Jon into one whole poem and made it very readable!
thanks for sharing :)
2006-04-01