Some editing to do.



THE OLD SWEAT (WW1 story/poem)

The Big Push , was on in a few days

Given leave to go in town

Bert , a young lad , to to young be out hear with us.

Fourteen if he were a day

Well me and 'im got to chatting , well more 'im than me

Me , I just listened , to be 'onest with you , affter two years hear

I did not give a fook, at the front , it don't matter much at all

It's always seems to be that gets lumbered!

Just cos I've been out hear two years , and I am just twenty five!

Me that gets detailed off to look after the green timber , new lads

He told he'd been in the Smack Home back in Ramsgate

Now I'd herd about that place , nothing much good about that boys home

Orphans , and boys abandonde by drunken fathers , or just their mums

Who could not cope wif there boy , or just one to many to feed and cloth

Them boys supposed to be educaited , trained to go on The Smacks as

Fishermen

Well you get the pitcher!

'' Well we had this one bloke , well he wonted me to , well , you know ''

I mumbled , some fining , hardly tacking much notice , but well I 'ad ask

didant I!

'' Na '' , '' wot he wont you to , Bert? ''

Well , he saw that me asking 'im to go on wif his ramblings

I'm finking '' give me strength ''

Bert whent on wif his story of woe

'' The bastard , wonted me to touch his dodger ''

'' You know , touch his cock , his fooking dick!''

'' Well mate , he'd dun it to a few boys , I'd been told ''

'' The dirty basted '' , '' said I ''

Now , I wos feeling sick

'' wot you do then , Bert? ''

Bert went quiet

Then he said '' promise , you wont tell any one , Tom? ''

'' Na , I wont tell a sole , young Bert ''

'' Now get on wif your story , chum ''

'' Well it's like this , Tom ''

'' Well I grabde hold of wooden gaff* , laying close by , I lumped , the geeser wif a

Gaff ''

'' Like propoer hard , you know ''

'' How hard , Bert? '' , '' well proper hard '' , '' He look a proper mess ''

'' I don't recon I did for 'im '' ,

'' Any , way's , I wernt goner stick around to find , woz I , Tom? ''

'' Na , I got out , saw a London bound boat , got aboard that ''

'' The the skipper , wos shorthanded , and was not one to ask orquad questions

like''

'' when the boat , wos about to pass another ship going the other way ''

'' The skipper of the passing skipper hailed 'os '' , '' looking in a bit of a ''

'' our Skipper '' , '' heavde to '' , '' and tied up a long side ''

Our skipper asked: '' what's up , matey? '' , '' we're at war , aye that we are ''

'' War? '' , '' who's at war? '' asked our skipper

'' Why England is , Government , said we are '' , '' It's in the papers ''

'' with the Frogs , I suppose '' said our Skipper , '' Na , Na , not the French this

Time round , matey ''

'' It's wif Germany , this time '' , '' er , aint our royals , like family , wif their bloke? ''

'' Year , their Kaiser bloke , thats 'im '' , '' cousins I fink ''

'' Well they aint kissing , now , like '' , '' when them stoped waring recon they will

Be affter ''

'' wot they 'ave a barney? '' , '' well some Duke and his misses been shot , so I

Heard , in the old smoke '' , '' wots that got to do wif us? '' , '' fooking nofing! ''

'' Well , thats goner be bad I recon '' , said our Skipper

'' na , could be good for profit , I recon! '' responded the other skipper

'' Our boats goner be needed I wager! ''

'' The armys mobilizing , reserves and the T A and all ''

Aye , as armed coastal gunboats , with in a year , both lost at sea , no

Survivors , but thats another story for another time

'' Year , I knows all that , you little basted ''

'' You wona hear me out or wot?! ''

'' Alright , alright , just get on wif it '' , '' we aint got all night , you know! ''

'' Gawd give me strengh! '' There , woz , a crack of a rifle bullet wizing

Harmlessly past , a Tomys vice called out '' you two keep it down '',

'' Fred , almost tip over the platoons dixie of tea a fooking again! ''

'' Fook off , you '' , responded old Tom , with feeling!

Bert , took a breath , I gave 'im a Woodbine , we both lit up , took down a

Lungful of smoke , I 'ad a good cough , a gift from good Queen Mary (sick)

'' Well , get on wif it , Bert , wot 'apponde next? ''

'' Well '' , takeing one more gasp from the Woodbine, Bert went on wiff his tale

'' Well I got to finking , like '' , '' as the country woz at war '' , '' a good time to get

In to the army , sharpish '' , '' no rozzer's , come looking for me in the army ''

'' , When we got to Gravesend , I jumpde ship'' , '' found out where they were

Recruiting '' , '' read some words , took the Kings shilling , in short I'm 'ear wiff

This mob and you! ''

'' Just a mo , Bert , howd they let you in , your old enough to join up! ''

'' Well there were a mob , like '' , '' I stood behind , look at a blokes forms ,

Remberd the dates , change them some , so as not course attenshan , like and

What not '' , '' I spotted an old lady , who was watching us '' , '' I called to 'er ''

Right mother dear , I'm in the army now '' , take care mother dear ''

'' I will write '' , '' Well , that I recons , woz all the army needid to see! ''

'' Some behind me , recon they were pissed '' , '' they made a

Right racket '' , '' The , Sargent , went to sort 'em out , '' , '' He rushed past me ,

Me to join the transport , and that was that , I woz in! ''

'' Right , Bert , wot about your mum and dad? '' , '' Dads a goner , lost at sea ''

'' Well his Smack , blown on to The Goodwins , him and his boat still on , I recon ''

'' As for me dear old mum , recon she's in The Black Swan right now , pissed as a

nunn , on Gin ''

With that , they , left off and joined the tea queue

Ken D Williams

The Dyslexic Wordsmith

*Gaff: A wooden block that has rope running through it to race sails of boats and ships.
























Poetry by ken d williams The PoetBay support member heart!
Read 674 times
Written on 2014-02-24 at 21:03

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