IB M

I've always found it peculiar

How people categorize pain,

Comparing theirs with mine,

And concluding mine's worse.

But the way I see it, pain feels

The same no matter what brings

It about, there're no distinctions

To be made about it, pain is pain.

I always find it very disturbing

How people dismiss theirs when

They find out about mine, as if

What they feel isn't legitimate,

Or isn't as severe in comparison ;

As if their feeling pain is misplaced

And completely unwarranted 'cause

No horror stories exist to back it up. 

But I completely disagree.

The fact it's there is the most

Relevant part, not how it got

There.  Pain is pain. Period.

Mine isn't worse than yours.

Please don't say that, makes me

Feel like you're tossing yourself

Aside as if you didn't matter...

How we got here doesn't figure in,

We all know how it feels is all.

It was nice to talk through things with you,

For the first time in my experiences, I felt you

Could not only listen, you actually understood

Everything I presented your way about my life.

Everything you ever said to me in our conversations

Was always thoughtful, and evidently intelligent, like

I'd never encountered before meeting you.  Not once

Did you ever give me platitudes as a response, and

Not once did I ever feel disrespected in any manner.

It was so impressive the way you summarized back

To me what I talked to you about, how you filled in what I

Didn't fully express in the exact words I was looking for...

You cared, and you actually understood what I was

Going through.  Talking with you was so interesting,

And it pushed my thoughts to consider further than

Its sphere and see where my troubles were in control.

You helped me pinpoint where the fights were coming

From, and how I adapted according to my experiences,

It made facing the fears less of an unknown

And allowed me to gain a way to manage them.

Sincerely, thank you for all of your help,

I will forever cherish our conversations.

And thank you for using your talent for being there

For others, our time together changed much for me.

I feel lucky to have had the chance to talk with you.

Let's forget what holds down

Forge ahead despite the ghosts

We're better than this story

They fight hard to hold us to

Truth is what traces our path

And safeguards us on the way

It doesn't matter what they say

We know who we really are

Some day we'll be free, dear,

We won't fall out of the frame

And our resolve will prevail

No one will be able to stop us

We'll be the rightful victors

Out of this tormenting narrative

They won't see us coming at all

We'll blow them out of the fray

You watch and see

That day's coming soon

It's kind of funny the way we came to be.

At the time, I'd given hope on love,

And was certainly not looking either...

You, you were kind of roaming aimlessly

Without any specific plans in mind, but

Kids or cats were definitely not in the cards.            (I have both)

I was a right mess, things weren't going well,

But we naturally reached out to each other,

And so from Spain you flew over to Québec.

And we met in person for the first time,

Our having clicked online wasn't an illusion,

It was instant in person from the moment

We laid eyes on one another.

Can't say what it was exactly,

But we just knew then.

Twenty years later, here we are,

As loving and caring to one another.

I really don't know what I'd done

Had we not had this chance meeting

On PoetBay all those years ago.

It's funny how unlikely all of it seems,

But that's how it happened.

For eight months, we spoke online,

Then we met, we couldn't be apart.

It wasn't part of any plan and

It was completely unexpected, but

Here were are, twenty years later.

You're my love,

And I'm yours,

I'll forever be grateful

We had the chance to meet.

As I've let you know,

Summer days coming

Is a really happy time

For me as it's time to

Take my e-scooter out.

With my mobility issues,

This equipment helps me

Get around less painfully.

I abolutely love my e-scooter,

But came time to replace it

'Cause its lack of suspension

Was becoming a bit too much

On my body, cracks or bumps on

Roads reverberated up my spine.

So found a cross between an

E-scooter and an e-bike with

Suspension, and although it

Looks a little funny, it works

Very well, I couldn't be happier.

It's so great to be able to move.

Si je suis si unique,

spéciale et si gentille,

pourquoi se fait-il

que je suis si peu

entourée et si seule ?

Quelle contradiction !

Of course I understand,

But it doesn't prevent me

Having feelings about it.

Of course it's not your fault,

But still, I have to deal with

The consequences it brings.

What I want or need always

Cannot be met as-and-when

Because we're stuck with this.

They must be put on hold,

And so, I'm left on the side

Waiting until it gets better.

Of course I understand,

But this is hard to deal with

Because it'll never get better.

And as everyone, I feel...

And like always, everyone's

Needs come before my own.

And I just have to accept it.

Yeah, you might be right,

I'm feeling pretty miserable.

I'm finding myself awake

At 2am or 3am again unable

To sleep 'cause my body is

In a storm of physical pain.

So, yeah, it's starting to get to

Me, I'm completely exhausted.

Not being able to sleep is putting

Me back in my past hell, 'cause

I'm too weak to ward it off then.

You're right, I'm totally miserable.

But, as you know, nothing can be

Done about that one, just got to

Get on with it as best as I can.

I'll be honest with you, I'm not

Sure for how much more time

I'll be able to withstand it, though.

Not to be melodramatic about it,

But everyone's got their limit.

The intensity of my pain has been

Increasing lately, and it's just the

Start.  No improvements in 8 years,

Only this progressive deterioration.

I can't begin to describe what my

Body feels like on a daily basis.

What it feels like to make simple

Movements, forget the less simple.

There isn't a moment any time in

My body where there isn't pain.

It's a constant whether I move or not.

After a while, it tends to get to me.

As I expressed a couple weeks ago,

Trying to not let despair settle in,

But it's kind of tugging at me and

Not wanting to let go, pulling hard...

And I'm in no shape for a battle.

Look, I don't know why

You would even think

That I would find it sexy

Or remotely charming

To receive your 'dick pic'.

You think there's a girl out

There who looks at that

And finds it beautiful?

Sorry to burst your bubble,

But no one finds it is at all.

I don't want to see that,

It's a big zero for attraction.

Come on, man, is that the

Best way to court a girl

That you can come up with?

Sorry for my unbridled bluntness,

But that's so incredibly stupid

And so far from impressive.

It's difficult to believe that you

Think that'll even be successful.

Sending your 'dick pick' my

Way only tells me you're an idiot

Who is incapable of intellectual

Reflection and decent interactions

With others, a poor impression.

So, yeah, not going to happen,

Keep your 'dick pics' to yourself.

Osti de cornet, as we'd say here.

It's hard to imagine anyone thinking

It's a good idea to send pics like that.

Seriously, man, reevaluate things.

A knock on the door came one afternoon,

So I opened it.  Standing there was a

Youngish man and a middle-aged woman

With a clipboard, so I waited for them to

Offer their explanation for being at my door.

They introduced themselves as partisans

Of the Parti Marxiste-Léniniste du Québec,

And they were wondering if they could count

On my support at the upcoming elections.

Honestly, I had to ask them to repeat that...

Communism in Québec?  Marx and Lenin, what?

But these people were actually serious about

This, must admit I found it very surprising.

It's not exactly something you hear about,

Well, certainly not in my entourage, anyway.

To each their own, for sure, but wow... Lenin? 

A killer of millions, a harbinger of suffering,

Why on earth would I even consider his ideas?

That's simply ridiculous, I can't view it any

Other way, so you can definitely count me out.

But as I always do in these circumstances, I did

Not answer their question, only told them that

It's not a topic I wish to discuss with them and bid

Them well.  They were clearly a bit thrown off by

That, and attempted to insist, but I said we're done.

I'm not a political gal, but come on... 

What a strange hope to aspire to for Québec.