One imagines he said these things
in an attempt to be helpful, but still,
the words came in feeling like a shock.

He had said something along these lines:
"You must first begin by forgiving yourself."
I think I'd have liked to throttle him had I

been that way inclined by nature - I'm not -
so, instead, I calmly breathed in, then exhaled
for a moment before I delivered my thoughts.

I said: "Really? If you forgive yourself before
the one you've trespassed against forgives you,
how is that not: 1) selfish, 2) the grandest of insolences?"

Judging by the surprised look on his face,
I guess he hadn't thought of that perspective.
Recovered-anythings have a tendency to forget;

about the receiving end, more specifically.
I guess they need that part to disappear
in order to be able to move on...

See, I felt this strongly about it
'cause it's been done to me by my maniac family,
and there's no way in hell I'd ever do the same.

It's a level of disrespect I can't fathom
would ever bring me a healing touch, as he
suggests. I find it completely absurd.

Forgive myself as a first step,
even if I've not received forgiveness
from the ones I hurt when the thing happened?

It doesn't sound right.
It doesn't feel right.
I just can't get on board.