Sun.Moon.Stars.Rain

2012-04-06
hot


damn.




...

amazing.


why didn't you tell me you wrote this?

2012-03-17
Dude, how did I miss this one? Friggin' adorable.

2011-08-29
There are so, so many things I love about this piece. There's the beautiful, perfect simplicity of the structure. There are the strikingly original and breathtaking phrases like "Not so elegant in form/As in aura". There's the fact that the narrator starts out using "My" and transitions to "Our" halfway through. There's the subject matter. There's the last stanza. There are all the other stanzas. [But especially the last.]

...I could keep going, but I feel like you probably get the point by now.

No one I've ever met or will ever meet
In my entire life
Could ever come close to
Knowing me the way you do. I am

Very moved by this; it is perfection.
Each word belongs to each phrase,
Every phrase to every stanza.

-V.

2011-02-24
Beautiful beautiful beautiful BEAUTIFUL. We are discussing imagery in my creative writing course right now, and I really want to make everyone in my class read this poem. Then I will shake some of them and be like "BE BETTER!!"

But no, seriously, this is gorgeous. I could really see everything you described as a moving image in my head. There are just a few random edits that I can send you in an email or something if you want, but overall this is a very smooth, polished piece.

<3

2011-02-11
I think each poem has a different feel to it based on the way you feel about the subject. That kind of subtlety is often really hard to translate into words, and you've done an amazing job with these poems.

Ye verily, I love to read
Over your pieces and
Understand your family.

All of these poems are
Really fabulously fantastically
Excellent.

All of them show different
Ways of loving people, which
Even for professionals is hard to
Show. You did it, so you are
Outstanding! Really, these impressed
Me a lot and I kinda wish you could
Even consider a creative writing minor.

-Girl

2011-02-11
I was going to say what Morgan said, but then I saw Morgan's comment and I saw that he already said it, so...this entire comment was sorta pointless. X)

2011-02-10
These three poems are love incarnate. They're all so different, which makes sense because your way of expressing love is different for each person you express it to. But even as different as they are, there's still that underlying connection of sweetness and family and belonging and love. I really think you should make a collection of all your poems about family and include them in a chapter of your forthcoming book of poetry. <3

2011-02-10
Thought: While you're here we should totally do some workshopping together, because it's way easier to give feedback on a piece in person and I think we could help each other a lot.
Another thought: This is so breathtakingly adorably sweet, and I really hope the reason why you want feedback is because you want to give it to her as a graduation present. She needs to read it. <3

2011-02-10
Cute cute. =) You really capture well the awkward sweetness that tends to characterize moments of emotional bonding between a father and son. I love your language and imagery, particularly "I could feel our warmth mingling", and I also love the idea that you two were so caught up in the constellations that you only ended up sledding once; the real joy to be had that night was in the sky and in each other's company. Beautiful piece!

2011-02-10
This is fantastic!!! The pounding rhythm reminds me very much of Tennyson's "Charge of the Light Brigade". Really nice use of alliteration to create that pounding battle rhythm. Great write!

2010-11-18
"Their mangled bodies gazing up at their former lives, now barren"

Best.fucking.line.ever.

I'm serious...that is literally the best clearest most powerful exactly right way I have ever heard anyone describe fallen leaves. Anyone, be they student or amateur poet or professional writer.

"Gazing up at their former lives, now barren"

...

I am in awe.

2010-10-01
"leaving him exposed on the bed
confused and hurt"

REALLY does a good job of capturing that moment.

2010-10-01
This is in fact different than what you usually write. I'm not sure what I think of it, though I would like to point out that this is the second poem I've read of yours involving a boy drinking from a spigot, and the comparison is interesting.

2010-09-22
love.
this, and you.
[always.]
<3

2010-09-09
WHY ARE YOU SO DEPRESSING.

it's okay...you manage to be depressing and beautiful all at the same time. it's sort of unfair.

i'm really glad you've started writing again. =)

2010-06-27
GOD
DAMN.
How did I never comment on this piece?...I could have sworn I did way back when you first published it.
Damn.
Well...the point is, this is...I don't even have words. The originality of your imagery is as powerful as the imagery itself. You have come up with phrases here I have never seen before, but that perfectly and vividly convey exactly what you wish others to see. I am in awe.

For so powerful a writer to stay silent for so long
Is a crime against your readers. Please, then, Morgan--share your song.

(Bah, impromptu rhyming couplets X) they pop up every now and again. Sorry 'bout it. But please do write again--I love and miss your writing so much.)

2010-06-27
Apparently I never told you how much I love the lines

Why are the young, the blameless, now to die?
Why must they fall like ashes from the sky?

...which is a lot. Actually, this entire poem (song?) is amazing, though heartbreaking.

2010-06-02
Wow...again, quite a poetic punch to the gut--all the more potent because you manage to convey everything in just a few short phrases. I've really missed your onewords.

Poetic and heartbreaking, this
Oneword is an inspiring
Work; saying
Everything in so few words
Renders it even stronger.
Fantastic job; your
Unique and intense style
Leaves readers stunned

2010-03-05
Oh wow...amazing finish...
Understanding such
Tormented emotions is
Something only the most
Talented writer
And compassionate person can do
Nick, you should write more often, 'cuz
DANG, your work is
Inspiring and the world should
Not be deprived of your talents.
GREAT JOB!!!!!!!

<3

2010-03-05
Eerie, haunting, beautiful...this is a very effective poem. My eye was of course immediately snagged by the word "lugubriously," but the rest of the poem gave me chills as I was reading it.

2009-12-02
Little,
Our friendship will
Verily be an
Eternal bond.

Your poetry (as always) is
Original and beautifully expresses
Undying love and friendship.

All of us, as you know,
Love you dearly, and
We will
Always be here for
You when you need us.
Sincerely, Me.

2009-10-21
=/ these ARE really depressing...i wouldn't call them lame, though. just depressing.

2009-10-09
Lovely imagery...a truly well-crafted sonnet!! Amazing work!!

You, my friend
Are truly a master of
Yearning phrases and

For goodness' sake, this is an
Outstandingly amazingly
Really wonderfully written piece

Your
Originality and
Unique expressions shine!

2009-09-17
=( so sad...i'm afraid it happens all the time though...beautifully written, as usual. nice work!

2009-08-19
=( wow...powerful imagery here. for some reason the second time i read this poem i envisioned the two characters as truckers rather than an ordinary driver and passenger...i'm not really sure why that is.

2009-08-01
Boy...I
Read this twice and
I still feel
Like I need to
Look through it again so
I can fully
Appreciate every subtle
Nuance...you are the master of
Telling stories through snapshots

2009-07-30
X) Wowww...very clever. You had me completely tricked. Nice write!! =D

2009-07-30
Aw...=/ I wish you did too. You should.

2009-07-30
...Damn.

2009-07-26
Beautiful and jubilant
Occasions like this
Underscore the importance of
Naiive, simple fun
Certainly trampolining is an
Effervescently joyous activity

2009-07-22
...eesh...=/ not the most fun situation to be in.

2009-07-21
awww...=/ i actually really like the ending. i like all of it, but i think the ending might be my favorite part. so bittersweet, and sad.

2009-07-20
"The weight of the matter pulled it down..."

LOVE that line.

Very powerful stuff here. Awesome!

2009-07-19
=/ poignant and sad...beautifully told.

2009-07-18
Again with the realism and the weaving of a sharply defined, emotion-stirring scene...my heart goes out to this boy. Another awesome write!

2009-07-18
cute =) very sweet

2009-07-11
This is more uplifting and hopeful than most of your stuff has been recently...I like it. The uncertainty presented here is very realistic and the entire situation is made easy to envision by your clear, skillful diction. Well done!

2009-07-10
ummm can i bitchslap this teacher, please...

2009-06-27
A sad snapshot of what is unfortunately a common situation...my heart aches for those with alcoholic parents. Well-crafted.

2009-06-22
Hmm, I commented on the movie one before this one but I have basically the same thing to say about both of them. This is really well-crafted, as usual.

2009-06-22
Awww...poor guy.

You're really good at this kind of writing. Well, all kinds of writing, but this method you have of depicting brief, poignant experiences from one person's perspective is especially effective. Well done!

2009-06-18
Um, this is utterly terrifying...that's not even a powerful enough word for this, but you've left me somewhat speechless here. You really are developing into a master writer, with the ability to control language and to turn mere words into feelings, into lines and ideas and forceful images that cannot be ignored. Spellbinding write.

2009-06-09
Dang...your imagery here is brilliant...without the last stanza this poem would be scarily dark, but I like the hopeful note provided by those last few lines. It's almost as though two possible outcomes of the future are provided with the second and third stanzas (don't know if that's intentional or not, that's just the feeling it left me with). Amazingly well-written.

2009-06-04
...wow...this is insanely powerful...and very very bleak. amazingly well-written, as always, and very intensely piercingly desolate.

2009-05-27
umm...i've been sitting here for about five minutes trying to comment on this, and i can't...my brain won't stop spinning...umm...i'm just going to read it again instead. and then again after that. and again, and again.

(incidentally, i have a poem saved in my drafts that i started about a month ago that bears this exact same title. you are my twinface.)

2009-05-22
Simply beautiful. =)

2009-05-21
Wow...this is really

Involving and deeply moving
Nice use of repeating
Themes throughout; very
Effective
Nothing good would
Seem good without the bad
Even darkness yields light

This comment might not make sense, but this was a very engrossing read...I greatly enjoyed it, and now that I've commented will probably go back and read it again.

2009-05-20
Again, very effectively structured with the hanging sentences and final unequivocally punctuated statement...this is

Sort of terrifying and
Certainly an
Astounding work
Really,
You are getting

Better and better
Unbelievably
Tense atmosphere here

All of your
Writing has an
Energy to it that is
So compelling and
Out of the ordinary
Methinks ye be an
Effervescent writer!!

(And a damn good one!)
(No, that's not part of the acrostic)
(Neither is this)
(Even though it says "Anne"...weird)

2009-05-19
Compelling and well-composed...I especially approve of your decision not to end your sentences until the very last one. Awesome write!

2009-05-15
you should probs do this...it sounds like an awesome idea...good advice