another portrait of an anonymous friend, partly inspired by the character of the 17th Earl of Oxford, whom some say wrote Shakespeare.
"Why can't I reach you?
Why are you never at home when I come by?
Don't you want to see me again?
What did I do wrong?
Or is it just that I am too old?
This pathetic old ridiculous fool
is then good for nothing and unqualified for love
and a thing to just sort out and forget all about.
No, no woman's heart can be so cruel.
There must be something else.
Did I frighten you?
That was the last thing I wanted to do –
on the contrary I always observed the strictest politeness
to spare your delicacy and my own vulnerability,
for no feelings are sorer than the faithful lover's,
and no lover's feelings are easier to wound than an old one's.
Or is it just so simple and vulgar that you prefer someone else,
someone younger that you can dominate,
someone who doesn't flinch at making sex
but is prepared to make child with anyone,
a vulgar playboy who doesn't care about his victims
and forgets immediately whom he laid before...
In that case there is only disappointment
and nothing else to say or do
but to say farewell to love
and consider oneself a pathetic ridiculous failure
impossible to redeem or even to feel sorry for
since he just gave up and fell a victim
to his own vulnerability and the doubts of his misgivings
and was not made to receive love but only to give it away
thus making his life of love a constant bankruptcy,
and whether it was worth it or not is a totally different story."
- Said the old fool and went away and fell in love again.
Poetry by Christian Lanciai
Read 519 times
Written on 2006-09-20 at 10:10
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209. The pathetic lover
"Why can't I reach you?
Why are you never at home when I come by?
Don't you want to see me again?
What did I do wrong?
Or is it just that I am too old?
This pathetic old ridiculous fool
is then good for nothing and unqualified for love
and a thing to just sort out and forget all about.
No, no woman's heart can be so cruel.
There must be something else.
Did I frighten you?
That was the last thing I wanted to do –
on the contrary I always observed the strictest politeness
to spare your delicacy and my own vulnerability,
for no feelings are sorer than the faithful lover's,
and no lover's feelings are easier to wound than an old one's.
Or is it just so simple and vulgar that you prefer someone else,
someone younger that you can dominate,
someone who doesn't flinch at making sex
but is prepared to make child with anyone,
a vulgar playboy who doesn't care about his victims
and forgets immediately whom he laid before...
In that case there is only disappointment
and nothing else to say or do
but to say farewell to love
and consider oneself a pathetic ridiculous failure
impossible to redeem or even to feel sorry for
since he just gave up and fell a victim
to his own vulnerability and the doubts of his misgivings
and was not made to receive love but only to give it away
thus making his life of love a constant bankruptcy,
and whether it was worth it or not is a totally different story."
- Said the old fool and went away and fell in love again.
Poetry by Christian Lanciai
Read 519 times
Written on 2006-09-20 at 10:10
Save as a bookmark (requires login) Write a comment (requires login) Send as email (requires login) Print text
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