Shame Filled Nights
Why can't I do anything right?Why must I always be cast aside?
Why?
Why can't I be truly happy?
Why can't I have someone to call my own,
To hold,
To love,
To share my life with?
Why must I always be the morale support?
Why can't I be supported?
Why can't I open up and let them see the true
Soul that inhabits this grotesque figure?
What is wrong with me?
Why can't I be prettier?
Am I not worthy of love,
Of joy?
Must I always rely on sarcasm to fit in?
Can't someone love me for me?
Can't I let go and burst through this wall
Of insecurity and self-hatred?
Am I always to be held prisoner to my own
Shame?
As many times as I ask myself these questions
I know the answer.
I am not worth the effort of love,
I won't let anyone close with my embarrassment and
Disgrace.
I will never know what it is to have someone love me.
For no one can love someone, such as me.
Poetry by sweet despair
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Written on 2009-05-22 at 06:08
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