| Betrayed
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2005-11-22
i'm not sure i'm up to the task of commenting on this. my heart is in such a place that this affects my being as i read it. my soul responds to the words with images. it calls up painful moments in my life almost at will. i've been the guilty, i've been the one left behind. and this reverbates in my soul, calling me to sadness, shame and contrition. it's so damn good i'm awed.
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| Adoration
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2005-11-21
suuuch love and adoration, quite frankly it makes me sick!
;)
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| Salacity.
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2005-11-21
~*WoW*~
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| Lonely
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2005-11-21
heart beating dry sand... well that's just......
wow
they nearly stand alone themselves, a poem all their own
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| suffocate
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2005-11-21
(i don't think i breathed the whole time that i read that...)
wow you're just too darn good!!
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| confusion
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2005-11-21
have you been spying on me??? :))
square one?? more like square zero.
another good one, well done. :)
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| let it go
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2005-11-21
sometimes it's hard to just let things go... it's good advice, but it is truly easier said than done. it means changing whole ways of life. it means finding the positive when surrounded by the negative (which happens to be closing in with pitchforks). and frankly, most days i'm just too darn lazy ;)
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| this moment
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2005-11-21
(tries to dance but trips over own feet and falls miserably on the floor)... guess this just isn't my moment :p that and, i really just can't dance ;)
another good one :)
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| bittersweet memories
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2005-11-21
yikes! your poetry is blowing me away. i don't want to read this one to closely, but i can't help myself... and i don't want to cry!
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| who am i?
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2005-11-21
oh my, that's just incredible writing... --no words!!--
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| what happened
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2005-11-21
the very nature of humanity means we let each other down, and often
sad but true :(
expressive write, with strong feeling coming through, well done
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| The Poet
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2005-11-21
i have to agree with you, KJC is one hell of a poet, a very encouraging sort... and this is a great tribute :) a five, and wholehearted agreement
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| Love
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2005-11-21
there is just something about these lines, that is exceptional...
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| Normandie Forest
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2005-11-21
rhythm and rhyme are flawless, and it's a gorgeous scene you describe. well done :)
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| True or False?
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2005-11-21
true or false? my answer?
yes.
(yay, i'm right, i'm right!!) lol
actually, it's a good point we make. the world is never going to get any better until we get busy making it better. good write :)
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| free you
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2005-11-21
just stop and jump, eh? throw it all away? thought of that, but really, aren't there better ways to go besides smashing to the cement in a mess that would make roadkill look good?
lol... i don't know if there is such a thing as freedom, actually. there is certainly a lack of it... but i think freedom always comes in degrees.
i enjoyed the read
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| Forever Amber
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2005-11-21
until you get cloned, that is... yaaaay, there is life after amber ;)
i like jurassic park, good movie....
deep thoughts here... kind of makes you think of the impersonal-ness of it all... makes me think of that "death museum" where they've got corpse art on display... whew it's freaky.
good writing, and it's good as a stand-alone without the jurassic park mentioned in the author notes. but it was nice to have insight into the writing process :)
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| Insane
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2005-11-21
the flow of this is incredible, and your words strike a chord with me today, as i find my own meanings within... (goes to get a sleeping bag) i'll just be over here sleeping on the corner of your poem page, it feels like a lullaby right about now.
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| Good night children
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2005-11-21
"one more page is torn from the calendar of craving" -- i love that line. this is really good. :)
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| change of season
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2005-11-20
one small piece of advice: if there are birds flying over head, methinks it might be wise to keep your mouth shut.
(riotus laughter) eww. sorry for that. kiddn.
actually, i just adore your last two lines, they close it with a quiet, sad aching feeling, making the poem complete. well done.
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| The future
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2005-11-20
in the future? (just a little answer to your last question there...)
indeed, hope for the best... but prepare for the worst.
the future is an "f" word, there is only now. ;)
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| loveis
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2005-11-20
love... simultaneously the greatest strength and weakness of mankind.
yupperz.
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| Boredom
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2005-11-20
yeah.
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| the flapperer
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2005-11-20
(flaps)
lol, i like the quirkiness of this. how cool.
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| The Golden Rays
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2005-11-20
a good, positive message. if only life really were so simple... a beautiful thought, a wondrous ideal.... and a world full of humans to wreck it.
still, gorgeous... and saddening to me, to know that some people will never see that ray of light....
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| The Essence of Me
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2005-11-20
ouch. this simply packed a punch. the essence of you, appears to be moments from breaking. a few of your lines really hit home... (especially the part about crying out to your creator, as i do that myself i do so as a failure, so i really "get" that feeling) and as you should already know, the best poetry lends itself to the situations of others. well done.
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| What the Old Man Sees
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2005-11-20
this is really awesome. we've all got many memories to share, especially the eldest of us... and we'd all do ourselves and others a favor, if sometimes we'd simply take the time to listen. good job.
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| Moving On by M.A.Meddings
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2005-11-20
grounds for divorce. the ol' i was right and you were wrong, is anything ever so simple???? methinks, NO. if two people split up, it is the failing of both.
but that, my dear, is an opinion on the content and not the text. so, i'll try harder.
there is apparent hurt here. the last two lines rhyming made it feel finished, so they had a good effect. there is honesty here, it feels like a heart splayed out. all in all, a fine poem.
love is humanity's greatest strength, and simultaneously humanity's greatest weakness.
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| No conduct of mine by M.A.Meddings
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2005-11-20
i'm not sure there are truly any old-fashioned gentleman left, i think they went the way of gnomes, elves and fairies. and dragons and halflings and chivalry. ;)
still, nice to see anyone out there still believes in such ideals.
nice poem :)
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| Hairpin
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2005-11-20
life is so unfair. and a person who has lost a love, is indeed a lost soul. intriguing thought about all there being left is a hairpin.
this is very well written... keep it up.
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| For the exceedingly boring there is always Goring by M.A.Meddings
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2005-11-20
looooooooong as it may be (laughing at the other comment on here ;) i read it start to finish and found it to be fresh and (sadly) true to life. nice touch with the geographic places, the names, the narrative. this was geniunely funny (especially when you think of actually goring those boring little cheaters. literally. :))
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| The wolfman
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2005-11-20
the wolfman's smile is chilling. turn it off! make it stop! turn it off!
actually the rhythm and rhyme of this is very good, and the curious picture of the grinning wolf man is cool.
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| Love hurts
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2005-11-20
i know the feeling of asking yourself why? why? why?
and love hurts more than any other pain i've yet to encounter, so true... but i don't think that true love can ever really disintegrate to hatred. hurt, yes. anger, yes. crimes of passion, you betcha. but hate? i just can't see it.
nevertheless, a feeling piece that showed your emotions and the narrative of a realistic stream of thoughts... good job.
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| Anger
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2005-11-20
i hate you are three of the meanest words a person can say to another. hateful words are never justified.
but perhaps, if you look at it on the flipside, it isn't just that simple. because, there are ALWAYS two sides to every story.
still, good write. the last couple of lines though, left me reeling. pride is not a reason to lose love. but if one person is forever bending, they will break. "dear" can't always be right, because "dear" is human, too.
the things people put each other through!
a thoughtful piece that reaches out to me here and now and lends itself to my situations, well done.
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| Bar talk
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2005-11-20
indeed, sometimes all a person needs is a listening ear to make it all better... and we can all spare a few minutes of our time. good point you make here.
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| Excuse me....Over here...
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2005-11-20
i hate that 'invisible feeling'... i can see the childishness of it, but i find it endearing. sad, how people treat one another. life is certainly not fair.
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| WHEN BODIES SPEAK
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2005-11-20
well done, rk :)
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| Nightmare.
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2005-11-20
not exactly... but, it's hard to be scared in this frame of mind. i figure that all the bad crap that could happen, mostly already did.
this is truly well written, it just wasn't enough to pull me from the place i'm already at. the bold is a nice touch.
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| spare me a minute
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2005-11-20
well then pass the salvation and bandages my way, and keep the time (personally i find passing the time to be agony anyhow)... :)
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| Solitude
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2005-11-20
yes, being in high school is hard. but things can be better, you've just got to keep trying... :)
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| Untitled
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2005-11-20
that line about not being able to meet eyes, because they catch flaws... that caught my eyes. well done with that. this is a good text but (since you asked at the top for some constructive criticism) i would like to see it shortened, i think the point could be gotten across without so many extra words. but, it's YOUR poem, and it should be how you want it to be, so just friendly advice here. the last coupla lines carried a punch too, an excellent ending for it. all in all, good writing :)
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| What Care I
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2005-11-20
i love the idea behind this... what care i? for if it's all without you, it is bland, dry and mediocre. life tastes like stale crackers, smells like a disinfected hospital hallway, sounds small and far away, looks gray and uninviting, and feels like nothing through this sort of numb. what care i, indeed. a lovely tribute (all three parts of it), quite the labor of love.
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| Once Again and Forever No More
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2005-11-20
in the ponderous state in which i find myself, this leaves me very sad. love, the harshest most wonderful curse of humanity.
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| Thoughts
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2005-11-20
people are listening everytime they read your poetry.
i know about missing people, those empty moments sitting, remembering, crying, cursing reality. life's not fair.
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| Open up.
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2005-10-02
i hope he does hear our plea.
i like this... the search for answers...... such a huge undertaking.... i hope you find what you seek.
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| SOC to Woodrow Wilson
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2005-10-02
indeed, a good point you have. isn't life sucky?
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| TERRORISTS
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2005-10-02
stupid fucking losers... and all in the name of god. a good write, here.
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| Society Glitch
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2005-09-24
i can't write one of these for the life of me and have it come out decent. you however, seem like a cat stretching its body into a natural shape - form. and you say you are not a poet! could've fooled me, poetess, for indeed that is what you are :)
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| Dreams
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2005-09-17
i like this. hopes and dreams, a favorite theme of mine, because of the astounding ease with which they can make things exponentially better - or exponentially worse.
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| Boobies
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2005-09-17
well that's a lotta boobies.
i see serious literary merit here, you spelled all the words right.
i'll bet you had fun coming up with that, hope your keyboard's not too sticky.
too easy of a target ;) and fun/ny
:)
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